Flight of the Conchords Wiki
Hiphopopotamus vs. Rhymenocerous
1x03 - Hiphopopotamus vs. Rhymenocerous.jpg
Vocals by Bret McKenzie
Jemaine Clement
Heard in Mugged
Appearances By Bret McClegnie
Jemaine Clemaine
Album(s) Flight of the Conchords (2008)

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"Hiphopopotamus vs. Rhymenocerous" was featured in the episode Mugged and is performed by Bret McKenzie and Jemaine Clement.


Hiphopopotamus vs. The Rhymenoceros takes place during the mugging. Jemaine and Bret attempt to fend off the muggers with bluster then launch into a gangsta rap song. It parodies various rap clichés such as references to "bitches" and "hos", though in a deliberately tame manner ("there ain't no party like my nana's tea party"). The video is filmed using common hip hop music video techniques such as low camera angles and rapid movement of the performers towards and away from the camera, and bears similarities to the music videos of the The Beastie Boys.


Lyrics for Hiphopopotamus vs. Rhymenocerous from Mugged

I'm the mother flippin' Rhymenocerous / My beats are fly and the birds are on my back / And I'm horny / I'm horny / If you choose to proceed you will indeed concede / Cos I hit you with my flow / The Wild Rhino Stampede. / I'm not just wild, I'm trained, / Domesticated / I was raised by a rapper and rhino that dated / And subsequently procreated / That's how it goes / Here's the Hiphopopotamus / The hip hop hippo

They call me the Hiphopopotamus / My lyrics are bottomless

Sometimes our rhymes are polite/ Like, thank you for the dinner Ms. Right/ That was very delicious goodnight/

Sometimes they are obscene/ Like a pornographic dream/ NC-17 with ladies in a stream of margarine/ Yeah, some margarine/

They call me the Hiphopopotamus / Flows that glow like phosphorous / Poppin' off the top of this esophagus / Rockin' this metropolis / I'm not a large water-dwelling mammal / Where did you get that preposterous hypothesis? / Did Steve tell you that, perchance? / Steve.

My rhymes and records they don't get played / Because my records and rhymes they don't get made / And if you rap like me you don't get paid / And if you roll like me you don't get laid.

My rhymes are so potent that in this small segment / I made all of the ladies in the area pregnant / Yes, sometimes my lyrics are sexist / But you lovely bitches and hoes should know I'm trying to correct this.

Other rappers dis me / Say my rhymes are sissy.

Why? Why? Why? / What? / Why exactly? / What? Why? / Be more constructive with your feedback, please. Why? / Why?

Why, because I rap about reality? / Like me and my grandma drinking a cup of tea? / There ain't no party like my nanna's tea party. / Hey! Ho!

I'm the motherflippin' / I'm the motherflippin' / I'm the motherflippin' / Who's the motherflippin?

I'm the motherflippin' / I'm the motherflippin' / I'm the motherflippin' / Motherflippin'

Flight of the Conchords Songs
The Most Beautiful Girl (in the Room) · Robots · I'm Not Crying · Inner City Pressure · Boom · Rock the Party · Hiphopopotamus vs. Rhymnoceros · Think About It · Song for Coco · If You're Into It · She-Wolf · Pencils in the Wind · Happy Birthday, Sally · Song for Sally · Business Time · Bowie · Bret, You Got It Going On · Albi the Racist Dragon · Mutha'uckas · Leggy Blonde · Foux du Fafa · A Kiss Is Not a Contract · Mermaids · Ladies of the World · The Prince of Parties · Cheer Up, Murray · Frodo (Don't Wear the Ring) · Bret's Angry Dance · Doggy Bounce · Rejected · Femident Toothpaste · Angels · Sugalumps · You Don't Have to be A Prostitute · Rap (Is Not Very Good) · Hurt Feelings (Reprise) · Stay Cool · Like In My Dreams · Friends · Too Many Dicks on the Dance Floor · Do Australians Feel Love · Carol Brown · We're Both in Love with a Sexy Lady · Canine Pepilepsy · Love is Your Weapon of Choice · I Love Dogs with Epilepsy · Scarborough Fair · Demon Woman · 오! 그대여 춤추자 · Fashion is Danger · Bret's Day · I Told You I Was Freaky · Petrov, Yelyena, & Me